I feel like a fucking yo-yo. I can’t decide what I make of all of this. Some days I’m literally curled into a ball sobbing my eyes out (Fuck you, Glee, for doing ‘For Good’…) and some moments, like just now when I’m walking home from eating dinner at my counterpart’s house and the weather outside is stunning and she makes me feel at home (finally), I’m so glad I’m here. I feel that that’s probably what the next two years are going to be all about. Lots of bad moments, but the good moments work their asses off to outweigh them.
I honestly didn’t think that the adjustment into permanent site would be this difficult. I’ve lived away from home before, been in foreign countries alone for extended periods of time, and have taught – albeit not this formal – and yet for some reason this is just kicking my ass. I haven’t quite figured out how to dig my feet in and set up shop here. My language has suffered a severe blow in the past week ‘cause of the extensive amount of time I’ve spent with Americans. I’m constantly grasping at straws and have become a genius with miming, but still can’t quite make the mark. I think that as soon as I get more confident with my language and start meeting people in the village that things won’t be as daunting, but for now, put up with the silliness and complaining you’re more than likely getting from me.
Also, before I forget, what kind of stupid jerkface decides to text me at silly o’clock in the morning to tell me that SHE KNOWS WHO RIVER SONG IS?! Seriously. COME. ON. Haha. I mean, I know that I’m doing pretty well in regards with missing TV shows and movies, but that bit of information is one you can’t just dangle in front of my face like that! That’s like saying (and I hope at least some of you get this reference) ‘Found out what the numbers mean and why Walt is so special…’ when the person on the receiving end of information is in outer space. Not cool. ;) If you don’t have an immediate way for me to find out said information on my own, then just steer clear of saying things like that. Haha.
Starting an English club tomorrow. Absolutely scared shitless. Didn’t really think I’d be starting work less than a week after moving here permanently. But I guess I am. My counterpart Rahat Eje and I are thinking about starting a dance club, an American cooking club – which will be abdan interesting since no one here likes the majority of American food! – and maybe even a movie club. We’ll see how any and/or all of those work out. Also, if you (Amy and other theatre people, this is for you!) know of any good shows to do for young people, or at least with an ok English ability, PLEASE send me the scripts. Either by post or by email. I’m hoping to start a theatre troupe in the next two years and any and all help would be greatly appreciated.
Rahat Eje asked me today while we were walking around the village, ‘Do you have any ideas for your secondary project?’ and I literally just blanked. I have no idea what to do. I know I don’t have to decide right this second what I’d like to work on while I’m here, but most people at least have an inkling as to theirs. I guess only time will tell on this one. Who the hell knows what I’ll end up doing?
Another request for you friends out there: Do people want to email me some of their favourite recipes from home? I seriously want to do a bit of cooking for myself while in country and try new things – I’m already amazed at how much my taste buds are changing out of necessity – but my cookbook is a bit limited. Send me your favourites that you think I could make here in country, or if they’re THAT amazing and there are ingredients you don’t think I can get my hands on… Care packages! Haha. Tamashaw (‘just kidding’ in Kyrgyz). But only kind of.
How’s everyone doing with life? How are B’s fightin’ against the ‘Nucks? Last time I checked they were 0-2. Still the same? To my babes in Boston, seriously wishing them ALL THE LUCK in the world. How’s BabySkip faring during her first summer? Lose enough sleep yet? How was the new X Men movie? Decent? James McAvoy gorgeous as ever? How does it feel being finished with your first year of grad school? Epic? Only how many more to go? ;) Who has some really awesomely epic book recommendations for me? Also, does anyone know who was officially cast as Peeta for The Hunger Games movie? It wasn’t that kid from Weeds, was it?
I feel that this entry’s going to be a short one ‘cause my brain is completely jumbled with far too many feelings, emotions, languages, logistics, plans, etc. and can’t think properly. I also have kichene homework to prepare for tomorrow’s English club.
Missing you all and hoping that your summer is off to an amazing start. Love you.